What makes a good ride (part one)

Firstly I need to speak of the sin of Onan. Recently I was forwarded this picture. On first sight it shows a miscreant engaging in an act that is normally reserved for private places and not on your dearly beloved's sofa.

Technically this individual could not have committed the sin of Onan, because Onan's sin was spilling his seed on the ground. I have it on good authority that there was no soil in the room and the individual pictured did not wander outside and scare the neighbours. However in the broader, more current usage of the term onanism, I think he's guilty.

Just remember, my spies are everywhere, ergo one should always get the Love Glove out in a private locked room.


Onto more important matters than debating masturbation. Yesterday I enjoyed a great training ride. One hundred and forty eight kilometres of windy, damp, dirty pleasure. It had all the qualities that mark out a great ride:- company, quiet roads, scenery, a well planned loop, a shop in the right place and the smug sense of satisfaction that comes from riding in roughish weather that stops most others from venturing out. The gods also smiled on us, when the only puncture of the day was convenient enough to occur within a kilometre of the food stop. Also, as we rode, we could see large rain cells, rainbows and squalls, and we only really went through one. The roads may have been wet, but there was no traffic, and the weather was great to watch.


After starting with a bunch of eight, gaining one more in Manukau and then losing five at Alfriston, that left four of us to complete our chosen route. Our Wellington visitor, Tristan and I were fortunate enough to time our lap on the back to coincide with the block headwind on the Aka Aka straights. Messurs Junior and Troup certainly earnt their raspberry licorice there.


We also enjoyed a battling return through South Auckland with cross headwinds. Tristan maintains that he was tired at about one hundred and fifteen kilometres, but I don't believe him. The reason for my doubt is that when we entered old Papatoetoe he still wanted to go to Hunters Corner and look for Ladymen. I'm sure that he can find them Wellington, and not when he's in full lycra and covered with road film.


The ride will do all of us good, and bodes well for the next big one in four weeks time.